“So the rules thus far are ‘don’t be late’ and ‘don’t be absent from class,’ unless you are absent because of circumstances outside your control. In that case, notify me before class. If I walk in here and you are not in your seat, and I don’t already know why that is the case… I will assume that you are dead. We will hold a brief service in your memory and then continue on, as we know you would want.”
“Yeah I mean if you don’t know the answer that’s fine, but I’m gonna make you pick the next person I call on. It’s a social experiment I run. I like to see if people pick their friends or their enemies. Wildly amusing. Anyway, be prepared for that.”
“So as the plaintiff’s counsel, you review all the possible venues and pick the one that’s the fairest to everyone….. haaaaahahaha I’m just kidding. You rig the court in your favor as much as you possibly can.”
“You’re supposed to go to a basement during a tornado. Why don’t y’all have basements?” “Can’t watch from a basement” “You’re going to die”
“My own law professor once described admiralty jurisdiction as ‘shit that happens on boats’ so [writes ‘boat shit’ on the board]”
“So then Congress gave itself a raise and America shouted, ‘Give it back you evil bastards!!!’ so loudly that they did.”
“I will provide you with pizza. For beverages, you’re on your own, but please abide by Baylor policy. Which is that we can’t have FUN.”
“And WHAT do we find outside the cities????? C O W S”
“All the desks on the third floor are reserved for 3Ls in practice court. Since you’re dying like, 100% of the time, they kindly give you a place to die. Sometimes you can see the lost souls wandering past the balconies….”
[makes a list of twenty-four things that could go wrong] [writes TRUMP in all caps as number twenty-five]
Round two:
“You don’t want conservatives! You want someone that will redistribute a little wealth! Get some commies! But don’t ask for them out loud, or it won’t end well.”
“Occasionally someone will walk into your office and start with ‘well just as a matter of principle…’ and that right there? That’s when you pull out your extra-strength Advil, because it will be a long day.”
“You can walk into a restaurant and just say, ‘I want tea.’ Sweet is implied! If you don’t want it sweet, it’s ‘tea, hold the sugar,’ and I like that!”
“My biggest goal is to die in Texas. When Gabriel’s trumpet blows, I will be resurrected from Texas dirt… if at all. Depends on his standards.”
“And I say, ‘How much will you pay me?’ and they say ‘a shitload!’ And I say, ‘how much is a shitload?’ and what do you know? Our definitions match”
“So you see that it’s an unincorporated association, and your reaction to that should be ‘shit!’ That is absolutely the proper reaction. That’s a good reaction.”
“You know it’s not perjury if you cross your fingers, right?”
“I would definitely shank someone for pizza.”
“Right now you’re… you’re lawyer larvae. I have a sense for these things.”
“So obviously Congress sprang into action. Why are you laughing? Oh yeah, BECAUSE IT’S BEEN A QUARTER CENTURY”
good definition, but it technically does still include cereal
what if cereal…. IS soup
CEREAL IS SOUP
this definition technically includes like….pudding and yogurt too, tho, i think
they said “much of the time.” there are also soups that don’t contain any of those things, e.g.:
soups that are broth only
soups that only contain noodles
matzo ball soup
soup contains water. there ain’t no water in fuckn cereal
Milk is approximately 87% water
If I may play devils advocate, cereal could also be considered a salad, with the dry cereal being the main meal, and the milk being a dressing or condiment. Before yall wanna talk about how salads only consist of vegetables, may I remind you of fruit salad, potato salad, pasta salad, bean salad, and the ugly cousin, jello salad.
yeah well my body is 60% water but u don’t see me chillin in a bowl with some carrots u feel
So, hot cereals (oatmeal, cream of wheat, etc) are forms of porridge, ie grains cooked in either a milk or water preparation. Lexically, porridge derives from pottage, which is unquestionably a soup.
Cold cereal is trickier as it has no stage of being cooked in the liquid prior to being served, nor is the liquid cooked beforehand the way most soup broths are (pasteurization is a technically different process from my understanding; I’m also not getting into the hairy subject of the preparation of milk substitutes).
I mean, it’s weird to think of cereal as a soup, but I’m not going to state for sure it isn’t.
Cereal is absolutely a soup. A weird, lazy breakfast soup.
Theoretically, you could argue that the time of day the food is consumed is the key. I don’t think there are any breakfast soups that aren’t cereal or porridge.
Pho is traditionally a breakfast food, I think. And some people drink broth in the morning instead of tea or coffee.
Things heating up in the soup fandom
reblogging as a linguist, to illustrate one of the basic problems one encounters in semantics
my body is 60% water but u don’t see me chillin in a bowl with some carrots u feel
people in fanfiction are so good at identifying v specific smells. I literally struggle to identify vanilla when I’m sniffing a candle labelled “VANILLA” how are these kids getting woodsmoke, rain, mint, and a whiff of byronic despair from a fuckin tshirt
Once I read a fic where they were like “he tasted like” and I’m expecting the typical formula (1 cooking ingredient + 1 natural phenomenon + “something uniquely [character name]”) but instead they said “he tasted like mouth” and it was one of the greatest fic moments of my life
Yeah, I see a lot of shark positivity posts on my dash these days and I really appreciate that. But I think something is being left out of the message so I’m just gonna say that:
YES, Sharks are not bloodthirsty monsters. They only do what they do because they are instinctively driven to do so.
NO, sharks are not your friends. They are not sea-puppies, gentle babies, or whatever BS anthropomorphic “cute” term you want to use to describe them.
YES, you are more likely to be killed by falling coconuts and any number of improbable circumstances than you are to be killed by a shark attack,
NO, sharks are not “harmless”. They are apex predators of their habitats and deserve to be treated with the same respect that you would give to a wild lion, bear, or wolf. JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT LIKELY TO ATTACK YOU DOES NOT MEAN THAT THEY WON’T. ACCIDENTS CAN ALWAYS HAPPEN, AND A SHARK’S PATIENCE IS NOT LIMITLESS.
YES, you should take every precaution to prevent a shark from “test-biting” you.
NO, a test-bite is not just a harmless consequence of shark curiosity. A TEST-BITE CAN KILL YOU. Just because sharks generally release people after the first nip and don’t make any effort to eat them does not mean that the bite is somehow any less deadly. You will bleed out in the water if the wound is bad enough.
YES, sharks are endangered and unfairly demonised and worthy of our support.
NO, that does not mean that anthropomorphising them and spreading false information is okay.
Please support sharks, but please, for the love of god, give them the respect they deserve when you do so. YOU ARE NOT HELPING THEM BY ENCOURAGING PEOPLE TO SWIM RIGHT INTO THEIR JAWS.
Your annual Shark Week PSA. Sharks are incredible, thrilling creatures but spreading the idea that they are all harmless or interested in eusocial behavior with humans does them no favors.
backup blogging platform 